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The Qgeek clan is preparing for what is quickly becoming an annual trip in search of mountains and snow for some good skiing. Knowing this, a co-worker forwarded this news article to me yesterday. I'm going to guess that this was not the highlight of this guy's ski trip. I might even go so far as to say that he was em-bare-ass-ed.


Too funny!

Sep. 13th, 2007 07:40 am
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Two friends of mine, a former co-worker and his wife, live in the Greater Seattle area, and have a blog that the periodically update with little tales from their rather unconventional life. I love these glimpses into their lives, because they remind me of how incredibly diverse people can be. They help me remember that differences help make the world a more interesting and vibrant place.

The most recent entry in their blog has me laughing so hard I'm crying. Here's one way to deal with Mormon missionaries when they come to the door (though I suspect it would work equally well with sales representatives and Jehovah's witnesses, too):

My language meme entry reminded me of a joke I heard a couple of weeks ago:

If someone who speaks two languages is bilingual,
and someone who speaks three languages is trilingual,
and someone who speaks more than three language is multi-lingual,
then what do yo call someone who only speaks one language?

punchline hidden behind cut )
From an e-mail my mother forwarded to is a list of interesting things you can learn if you have sons:

A long, but entertaining list of things I've NEVER done )

Just for fun

May. 26th, 2006 11:17 am
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A groundskeeper was making his rounds in a cemetery one day, when he heard a small, sobbing voice say "Why did you have to die?" The groundskeeper looks around, but he doesn't see anybody. Again, the voice says "Why did you have to die?" Curious, the groundskeeper walks in the direction of the voice. "Why did you have to die?" Finally, the groundskeeper finds a frail old man on his knees in front of a gravestone. "Why did you have to die?" The man is distraught. Unable to read the stone, the groundskeeper asks "Was that your wife?"

"No. Why did you have to die?"

"Was it you mother?"

"No. Why did you have to die?"

"So, who was it?"

"My wife's first husband! Why did you have to die?"

From my Inbox

Apr. 5th, 2006 04:34 pm
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I just received an e-mail that highlights the insanity of airline ticket pricing. You may have seen this, but it illustrates the absurdity so well that I just had to post it here.

What if Airlines sold paint? )
Here's a post from the blog entry of some friends of mine:

I think they may be onto something here.
I was talking to a colleague at work, when I noticed a copy of The Brick Testament on his desk. The book is an illustrated version of Genesis, using Legos to create the scenes. The book might have been intended to be a serious treatment of the biblical subject matter, but many of the illustrations were so absurd as to be hysterically funny. Turns out that there is a related website that posts many of these photos:

Check out the drowning sinners in the story of Noah and the Flood, in Genesis, or the Holy Spirit in the Birth of Jesus in the Gospels.
Now this is what I call a better mousetrap! Guaranteed to be noisy and messy, but you won't have to worry about that critter again! :o)

US Patent No. 269,766
US Patent No. 269,766

I received the following in an e-mail yesterday (though I can't imagine why! :oD), and thought I might share it since I found it amusing:
e-mail content )

Thanks [ profile] suellenr.
Condoms Are Named for Clinton, Lewinsky
Chinese Company Begins Marketing Condoms With Clinton, Lewinsky Brand Names
the body of the AP article )

Is it me, or does it seem like this is a rather late arrival on the market. After all, this is very old news.
Fox News
Thursday, April 07, 2005

A beer truck flipped over on a roadway overpass in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Monday, prompting local officials to comment on the tragedy.

"It is sad," Capt. Scott Logan of the Halifax Regional Fire Service told The Daily News of Halifax. "Chances are they won't recover any of the beer."

The truck, hauling 46,368 bottles of Alexander Keith's India Pale Ale, skidded to a stop against the overpass's guardrail, luckily avoiding a 50-foot plunge down to another road.

The female driver was pulled out of the cab uninjured — "more frazzled than hurt," according to Logan — letting rescuers focus on the calamitous aspects of the disaster.

"I had a tear in my eye, actually, when I was watching it," said police Constable Mark Hobeck. "It was full of beer. We were hoping a Hostess truck full of pretzels would come by, but no such luck."

Talk about alcohol abuse! You have to sympathize with the emergency response teams, eh?
The Associated Press

HONG KONG Apr 8, 2005 — Doctors have removed a leech from the nose of a 55-year-old Hong Kong woman after she swam and washed her face in a stream, a medical journal reported.

The rest of the article -- TMI Alert! )

I hate leeches. Needless to say, this article absolutely makes my skin crawl. And my wife wonders why I don't like hiking or camping...
This guy in Dallas sure did. [ profile] skyring posted this link in an obscure place, but I thought it was deserving of notice.
UNION SPRINGS, Ala. (AP) - Dreaming of ways to break out of jail is pretty normal.

But for the second time in less than a month, police have arrested a man for trying to break into the Bullock County Jail.

the rest of the article )

Is breaking into jail a hot new trend? How do you punish someone who wants to get into the jail?
DODGEVILLE, Wis. (AP) — Authorities in southern Wisconsin have discovered that capturing a kangaroo in a snowstorm isn't the hard part. It's finding out where the animal came from.

the rest of the article )

Hmmmm....[ profile] skyring, you wouldn't be missing a pet now, would you?
I got a good chuckle last night from one of the sub-plots on "West Wing," involving some drunken hunters crossing the border into Canada and creating a minor international incident. One of the White House military advisers kept trying to advance contingency plans for a military response, much to the dismay others. Aside from the humorous way it was presented on the show, this tickled by funny bone because it reminded me so much of something my youngest brother used to go on about.

My brother's silliness )

Then to top things off, I find this today:

LYNDEN, Wash. (AP) — A practical joke shut down a U.S.-Canadian border crossing for nearly four hours just as the weekend was getting under way.

the rest of the article )

I have to wonder, is there a connection here somewhere?
OSLO, Norway (AP) — A Norwegian family's swimming pool wasn't just bolted down, it was in the ground. But that did not impede a band of determined thieves.

When the Nicolaysen family visited their mountain cabin last weekend, they discovered a big hole in the yard in place of the swimming pool that had been installed 20 years ago.

"This can't be, we thought," Arild Nicolaysen told state radio network NRK last Monday. "We didn't think it was possible. No one can steal a swimming pool."

Evidently, someone did.

At some point since early November, when the family closed up the cabin for the winter, their 16-foot-diameter pool and all its equipment was uprooted and stolen.

"It must have been a terrible job to disassemble such a big pool. There is a steel lining all the way around, plus there is a plastic liner and then there was a skimming system, a filter system and a lot of big hoses and pipes," said Brit Nicolaysen, who owns the cabin with her husband.

Hmmm...I wonder how much I could get for my neighbors' pool.....
First, there's this:
ANETA, N.D. (AP) — A wild turkey flock may be crazy for moving to this town, which claims it holds the world's largest turkey barbecue each summer.

story #1 )

Then, this:
WHITTIER, Iowa (AP) — A wild turkey who lived life in the fast lane near this eastern Iowa town has died doing what he did best — chasing cars.

story #2 )

And last, but by no means least:
Turkey Terrorizes State Troopers (Friday, February 25, 2005) FOXNews

It was a brief but glorious run along an Ohio highway for one ornery turkey.

story #3 )
CANBERRA, Australia (AP) — An environmentally friendly paper manufacturer has stumbled upon an unlikely way to put an unwanted natural resource to good use.

the rest of the story )